#12 Thinking critically

My most convincing evidence is my claim that Northeastern University should make housing developments accessible for students because it would all together make for a more independent and rational student. I believe this argument is strong because a college is supposed it prepare their students for life post college, and having dorms could further fulfill that goal. My argument is structurally sound and readers can identify and relate to it. It also ties into my other paragraphs which in turn strengthens it even further. It shall be placed in the beginning of my essay to capture and keep the readers attention.
My weakest argument is how and where the funds would come from when building these residencies. I argue that alumni donations and tuition raises can be the answer. However, though alumni does give generous donations, it might not be enough to cover the hefty payments for one or more dormitories. Also, tuition raises would cause conflict between the university students and the students parents complaining that dorms are unnecessary and pricey or what have you.

#11 Pattern of errors

I have noticed throughout the years some pattern of errors in my writing. I would have to say that one major one would have to be within my introduction paragraph, and perhaps for others as well. The introduction is perhaps the hardest paragraph of an essay. I always struggle on my opening paragraph and never know how to start off. I always find it hard to pick a strategy to start off with like using a question, quote, phrase, statistic or fact. I think that this affects my essay quite noticeably in so that the intro is everything. It is where the reader determines whether they want to read further or put it aside. Maybe I can work on my intro and depending on the subject at hand I can go about choosing an appropriate strategy for my intro.

The second would have to consist of myself also being wordy in my writing. I feel as if I am doing it now too. Usually I like more emphasis in my writing and sometimes my sentences turn into run-ons. Sometimes there is unnecessary jargon type language in my writing and it seems to put the readers off I suppose. Maybe I can go over my papers in the end a couple of times and try to fix sentences into 2 or 3 more sentences instead of just one big sentence. Also, revise revise revise!

Lastly, my most minor pattern of error would be repetition. Sometimes I run out of things to say and just repeat prior sentences in a different way just for filler. But I can't help it when I find what I am writing about to be uninteresting and boring. I can probably learn to suck it up and just do the best I can, because thats life, right? Well, time doesn't stop for me so might as well do it. Puh!

Extra Credit Blog

Though I know it is past due, I would like to talk about my vakay over spring break. I went to Cali! It was my first time visiting California and it was beautiful! It is absolutely nothing like Chicago. Out there, there are nothing but hills and trees! It stayed at a constant temperature as well, unlike Chicago where the temperature fluctuates every ten minutes. It was sunny and windy and it was overall just a great experience. I had the chance to visit three big theme parks out there. The first, Seaworld. It is exactly what you think it looks like. It is similar to the Shedd, but with whales. I saw a dolphin show, which was quite interesting I might say. Dolphins are really coordinated. I also got to see the Shamu show. Let me tell you, whales are so big! Bigger than anything you can possibly fathom; up close anyway. But believe me, they are big. Around the time I stopped being fascinated, was when they started to splash the audience. Well, I did get splashed and felt like I just jumped in a pool. Also, I messed up my phone because I had it out to take pics. Bad idea. Neverthless, it was fun. The second was Universal Studios. That place is amazing. Thrilling rides and pics with characters like Beetle Juice and the Lorax. The only thing I did not like, the Prices! Everything was so expensive I found it hard to bring anything back to Chicago. The Third place was Disneyland. I don't care how old you are Disneyland is one of the funnest places to go. I spent at least 10 hours there just walking around and going on rides. The funnest ride had to be the Indiana Jones ride. That one was great. But yea, It was a really fun time. California in general is an awesome place to visit. The weather is nice, the people are nice, everything is amazing there. Though I do admit I missed Chicago. It felt great sleeping in my own bed when I returned. :)

Assignment #10

First, I would like to start off by saying that I think peer review is a great way to get help and meet new people and should help somewhat as reading your own paper 5 times really just becomes a blur after while. As for this class, I did not really get to experience a peer review session that was even remotely helpful, for my paper anyway. For one, students are just not at the same level, and while that one student that gives great feedback and help, the other student just skims through your paper and since they do have enough knowledge on the topic, just give basic assessments on grammatical errors. It was really a take-take situation when it should be a give and take one.
As a peer reviewer, I feel as if I can bring a lot to the table. Not that I am gloating, but I do know a hefty amount of things that I could offer other students. At least when I did participate in peer review my peers have told me that what i said was quite helpful because they did not understand the assignment to begin with. Which actually made me feel really good. However, while I was giving, I was not receiving because they did not know enough about the assignment. So in the end i found the peer review not as effective as it could be.
My ideal peer review process would consist of having students at the same level peer review with the same level students. I think they deserve to get great feedback too. Though you might be asking "what about the students that don't really know anything, just put them all together to fend on their own"? Well, not necessarily. Those students can pair with the others and that way there is a great give and take relationship. Everything would be in equilibrium. Problem solved.

Assignment #9

For my topic I am choosing to write about my college experience. So far I have encountered enjoyable moments such as making new friendships, and having fun and lenient classes. I have also enjoyed being able to choose my own times for classes as I work part-time. However, I probably have had more crappy experiences than enjoyable ones. I experienced a D last semester for a class. It was not the best feeling in the world and knowing that I had to retake the class and put in the effort all over again made my stomach churn. Even though I did not want to retake it, I knew I had to. Though I did not take it that well, I did see it as a sign telling me to step it up from there on out. It taught me that I can not slack off, because there is no make-up work at the end of the semester, or teacher-student conferences. It was a REAL wake-up call.
Apart from that, I suppose college is ok. I am still trying to get used to this whole "college life" thing where I am spending the whole day reading and the whole night writing. It really has been a struggle here in college, I just hope it gets better as I get past this nuisance of gen ed classes.

Reflection

First and foremost, I believe that in this stage of my academic career I have my own set of writing styles and organization patterns. I do not think that will really change much throughout the rest of my academic career. But, I do believe that this class has helped me think about writing in different ways by looking for deeper meanings and realizing theres much more to a paper than just words. Looking back at my first blog, I do believe my goals have somewhat been fulfilled. One in particular is preparing myself for those really long 8 page essays. I think I have learned to emphasize more on my ideas and positions and going more into detail than just stating it. It really has an effect when length is a key issue. Only if you are actually giving substantial ideas, not just filler.

In some ways, I want peer review to be a big help for myself and my writing. This is what part of the class I expected to be the most helpful. Considering the feedback I received, I either 1. wrote a close to perfect essay, or 2. was given feedback from someone who did not care much for peer review at all. I'm almost certain it was the second. Well, whatever the case, it is what it is.

As of right now, the class is very well organized and taught. I really enjoy the blogs, and how well you explain everything. I aslo like the seriousness, and that it can funny too.

My writing has not changed. It is exactly the way it was since the beginning of the semester.

To some extent, I do believe my writing has improved from one way or another. I believe everyday you write your writing will improve. 

Analyzing an ad

Purpose - The purpose of my ad is to lure in a younger audience, particularly younger girls, to entrust in their brand as it provides top comfort, protection, and simplicity, compared to other tampon brands. Through textual evidence and evidence from the setting that is provided in the ad itself it is clear what the purpose is.

Audience - The audience targeted is younger women, especially those who are first starting to experience menstruation  . The ethnicity does not really matter. The text says "great for first timers" and there are two little girls in the ad.

Genre -  I don't understand what you mean by genre.

Tone - I suppose the tone would be described as serious, but lively at the same time. This would make the audience feel as if the advertiser is serious, but since it is set for a younger audience,  they would want to relate by having a lively tone as well.